JOKES
| MR. O'NEAL | -- | WHO CAN TELL ME WHAT AN ISLAND IS? |
| LELAND | -- | I CAN; IT'S A PIECE OF LAND THAT WENT OUT FOR A SWIM. |
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| MISS LAYL | -- | DOES YOUR WIFE DARN YOUR SOCKS? |
| MR. McNEIL | -- | SOMETIMES SHE USES STRONGER LANGUAGE THAN THAT. |
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| MR. SCHMUECKER | -- | SO YOU WERE GRADUATED FROM A BARBER COLLEGE. WHAT WAS YOUR COLLEGE YELL? |
| ELVIS | -- | "CUT HIS LIP, CUT HIS JAW, LEAVE HIS FACE RAW, RAW, RAW!" |
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| JOE | -- | DID YOU WORK UP A GOOD APPETITE WHILE YOU WERE ON THE FARM? |
| MR. GRAMLING | -- | DID I? I ATE GREENE CORN UNTIL A GROWTH OF CORNSILK CAME OUT ANDCOVERED MY BALD SPOT! |
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| EVELYN | -- | IS THERE ANYTHING GOOD THAT CAN BE SAID ABOUT AUTO DRIVERS? |
| LELAND | -- | YES, THEY DON'T SEEM TO CARE ABOUT KILLING THEMSELVES ANY MORE THAN THE SEEM TO CARE ABOUT KILLING OTHERS. |
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| LELAND | -- | YOU USED TO SAY I WAS ALL THE WORLD TO YOU. |
| INABETH | -- | YES, BUT I'VE LEARNED MY GEOGRAPHY SINCE THEN. |
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| BERNICE | -- | WHAT'S WORSE THAN RAINING CATS AND DOGS? |
| OPAL | -- | HAILING BOMBS AND PARACHUTISTS |
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| BUD THURMOND | -- | GEE, THAT ROUGE LOOKS NATURAL. FOR A WHILE I THOUGHT IT WAS YOUR SKIN. |
| JOYCE | -- | WELL, IT'S THE NEXT THING TO IT. |
RECIPE FOR MODERN INCIDENT TAKE ONE IGNORANT, SPINELESS, NATURAL - BORN FOOL. FILL WITH QUART OF LIQUOR. PLACE IN HIGH-POWERED MOTOR CAR SET AT FULL SPEED. LET STAY FOR SHORT TIME. REMOVE FROM RUINS, PLACE IN RECTANGULAR BOX, GARNISH WITH FLOWERS. |
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© 2006 by PR Massey |